Wednesday, August 7, 2013

I'm sorry, do I know you?

The other week I was having a particularly hard time being in public, but it was a Sunday and I had to go to church, so I pushed through and actually stayed for all my meetings. I sat in Relief Society on the edge of the row, wishing I was invisible, trying to blend in with the chair, writing in my journal and keeping to myself. It worked out, the meeting ended, I put my chair away and attempted to make my escape.

A girl who is new and just moved into the neighbourhood stopped me and said, "Excuse me, but I just kept looking at you the whole meeting, and I was wondering, do I know you?" I looked at her, and not recognizing her, said, "I don't think so." She asked me if I had lived in the neighbourhood a long time, and I told her seven years, and she couldn't figure out where she would know me from and I told her I had one of those faces and quickly made my exit.

A few things:
  • I feel terrible. My reaction was like a deer in headlights; I just wanted to run away. I was completely caught off guard and therefore incapable of putting together complete sentences.
  • I would have loved to have tried to figure it out, but I totally didn't recognize her, and I do have one of those faces; people always tell me I remind them of their cousin, neighbour, roommate from college, friend from high school, etc.
  • I have only been blonde for six months, so even if I did know her from the past, I don't look like I did.
  • She's new to the area and doesn't know anyone, yet she had the courage to talk to me and I was weird and uncomfortable around her. I hope I didn't freak her out.
  • I really hope she didn't feel like I was weird or blowing her off or like I thought she was weird. I am glad she approached me, but I was in such a bad mental place that I just couldn't function in public that day.

I was mentally frozen and speechless and unable to pursue the conversation fully and truly hope she didn't think I was being rude and hope she will forgive me. I hope that at some future date that she will figure out where she knows me from or who I remind her of and that she's not afraid to approach me at a later time because of the way I acted.

Sometimes I should really just not interact with humans.

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